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Spectator Sport
Aug 2, 2009 muse Leave a comment
Sometimes a couple of weeks go by when I feel more like a spectator than participant, life on auto-pilot. Good news is auto-pilot helps keep the bus out of the ditch and I’m a fairly tuned-in spectator.
Last night I played a show in the midst of a very busy modern day village (Birkdale). Lots of restaurants and shops and people. Right in front of the stage there is grassy area encased by hedges where folks sat on chairs or blankets or the grass to listen and enjoy the transition from late afternoon sun to moonlit evening. It’s not a very large area, and there’s no broadening it because of the hedges and fencing that’s part of a perimeter surrounding a really cool fountain and pergola covered sitting areas with benches.
Not just any fountain, mind you, but a playground for kids to have an absolute blast while mom and/or dad stand by with towels and snacks. Of course lots of pics and video were being shot — everyone is just hangin’ and relaxin’ and having a good time. Then, at one point, Kevin, our lead picker asks (and I’m paraphrasing), “What’s it say about us that only the kids are running through the fountain?”.
Well, that thought didn’t resonate until later when I got home, unloaded, and sat down to unwind… why were there no grown-ups in the midst of the fountain, getting wet and letting go, too? Heck, it was a real sticky summer night, still 80+ degrees at 9:00 as we were winding down our set (love these early gigs). Truth is, I doubt I would have been getting wet either, but in retrospect, and if the opportunity comes up where I’m there with my kids, I may be more inclined to so after pondering Kevin’s question… the essence of which is, why be a spectator when you can participate?
Serendipitously, on Friday I’d decided to get back to my indie game plan. Now some of this means serious contemplation of what’s next… committing to decisions and living with the outcome of choosing to do something or not, and having no regrets. Which also means dipping into the fairly shallow pool of funds I’ve managed to scrimp and save over the last few months. Seems deciding how to use these bucks is always tough. But decide I must if I’m going to play the game, rather than sit in the stands and watch. It’s all good, and I’m thinking, about to get a whole lot better.
So thanks to Kevin and the big splash those kids were making last night… this ain’t no spectator sport.
Recovery Coffeehouse
Jul 21, 2009 sojourn Leave a comment
I didn’t have any idea what to expect when I showed up at Anuvia Prevention & Recovery Saturday afternoon. I’d been invited by Rick Spreitzer to join him and Trip Rogers for a couple of hours of trading songs in a songwriter round for staff, clients and others in 12-Step programs.
While setting up a few folks asked what kind of music we played. The puzzled looks could have been cause for my spirits to drop, but I was there to play. And play we did. It was a really well balanced round from the perspective of contrast between our songs. Though the audience was fairly sparse, they were attentive and receptive to both song and our light bantering, which often included audience members, as well as divulging intimate aspects about how songwriting impacts and affects our everyday lives.
We played these couple of hours out of a desire to share of ourselves in hopes we could spread a little joy. I believe we accomplished that objective. Truth is I was blessed by the kindness and grace of the staff and audience. I arrived without preconceived notion, and left feeling like a million bucks. Lord know I need to do more of this type of offering, and plan to reach out to other organizations.
This was the debut of the Recovery Coffeehouse, mothly installments to follow, with different writers and artists. Quite likely I’ll be a distant memory at Anuvia by Labor Day, but it’ll be a long while before the warm-fuzzy in my gut fades away. Can’t say I’d have it any other way.
Stake in the ground
Jul 11, 2009 DIY Leave a comment
It’s getting on half way through a pretty busy summer to date. Last week’s gig at the 4th of July festival with Desmond Myers was a sweet and satisfying musical experience. Desmond played well beyond his years, at the ripe old age of 17, and we were treated to a really good sound man, enabling a great jam for a very receptive crowd in downtown Greensboro, NC.
But now the schedule is settling down and it looks like the rest of summer will be relatively quiet gig-wise. I expect to have my updated web site online by end of September so this is a perfect opportunity to map out 4-6 songs for an EP to release simultaneously. Of course this means having to wrestle with picking just a few songs, and maybe even writing 1-2 new ones, without overcooking the whole effort, ending up frustrated and wishing I’d never started the project at all.
A big question is how much to track at home and how much at the studio, which is mostly dependent on balancing cost and expectations. Then there’s mastering and packing, or not… I mean, I could go for it doing the bare minimum in the studio, mostly drums and auxiliary parts, and keep the production simple, with much more likely achievable results. Reality is I don’t have a following, so to expect people to spend money on my songs may not be realistic. However distribution works out, whether per track or physical EP, the main objective is to get my material out there and begin developing a fan base.
So it’s time to change hats for a couple of weeks and layout the game plan, which needs to be pretty much in stone by August 1st if I’m going to hit the end of September target. This is both the fun and the peril of the DIY mindset, a lot of learning and adjusting on the fly. There will no doubt be frustration and heartache along the way, oh well. I’ve talked about this project for a while, it’s time to put the first stake in the ground, time to put up or shut up.
Shake… Stir… Pour
Jun 28, 2009 DIY, sojourn, songwriting Leave a comment
It’s hard to quantify how much I get out of absorbing great material, sound instruction and interaction with peers, at least until I filter what I learn into writing, recording, performing or promoting [etc.]. Here are some of the activities and objectives I focused on and participated in over the last couple of weeks:
I’m spending more and more time listening to fresh generally non-mainstream songs and writers, primarily by setting up stations on slacker.com, which enables me to listen to both old and new material by heavy-weight writers and artists like Elvis Costello, Lucinda Williams, Lyle Lovett, Shawn Colvin and Pink — the list is virtually … endless!
Though I wasn’t selected for the 2009 Horse & Writer Invitational, I was invited to attend three 1-hour conference calls with Skip Ewing, who graciously gave his time to mentor a small sub-group of writers deemed to have significant promise. As a result of Skip’s insights and encouragement, I’m asking different questions about what I’m saying in my songs and my approach to developing context and characters — plus — I played my piano for the first time in months.
I’m a TA (teacher’s assistant) for SongU.com and recorded/posted the transcript for weeks one and two [of four] of a basic theory course with Jai Josefs (Chord Chemistry). While I consider myself fairly proficient at theory, it never hurts to practice and refresh. Jai is a great instructor, and he led us through a quick but effective analysis of the Lighthouse smash “First Time” where we learned how contrasting harmonic function between sections significantly enhances the flow and punch of a song.
Last night was another solid evening of song and pickin’ with Rick Spreitzer at Summit Coffee, where we play every 4th Saturday. Then I got up early today (like, real early for a Sunday) and went into town with friends John and Cate Cloer for a photo shoot as part of my 
website update project; upon return (and after a sweet cat nap) I got on the horn with friend and Indie artist Brian Hartzog to kick-off planning the main topic for our next NSAI monthly meeting. The last thing I plan to do today (after a couple of hours of yard work and an early dinner) is setup an area in our bedroom strictly for writing — not recording, just writing… a desk, piano and guitar… complete with notebook, score paper and music stand.
I’m feeling pretty good about what’s going to come of all these efforts in the weeks ahead. I’ve got a several new songs in the hopper, including a couple of rewrites and co-writes. Of course, there’s rehearsal later in the week for a 4th of July gig in Greensboro with the talented Desmond Myers, the gig itself, and then prepping for my first songwriter round in quite sometime on July 18th.
I don’t expect I can keep this pace up every week, but surely hope it all leads to my becoming a better writer and performer, as well as a more complete musician and artist. Seems the more I get done the more that’s left to do. I’ll just keep shaking, stirring and pouring myself into the songs and let the chips fall where they may.
Internet in Heaven?
Jun 21, 2009 sojourn Leave a comment
This past June 10th marked the 2nd anniversary of Dad’s passing, a day threaded with pangs of remembrance. But today is Father’s Day, and the void is even more pronounced. Maybe coz it’s the weekend and I’ve had more time to reflect upon memories as well as the cause and effect of his being gone.
I still find myself talking to him, wondering what he would say about things going on in the world today, or situations in my life or the lives of my siblings. I left the nest pretty early on, and for the most part it took quite some time for the values and lessons he taught me to take. But today I can honestly say, I rely on the simplicity in his wisdom. Wisdom founded on honesty and integrity, hard work and gratitude.
I wish I could say I don’t struggle, that by now I’d learned every lesson well, and he’d give me a pat on the back and we’d go grab a beer. But the truth is I’m still a wild horse that yearns to roam, often shamefully thankless for the many blessings in my life and stubborn as a 3-foot thick wall. Of late, the restlessness in me is at fever pitch. Do I cross the river here, where the rapids are swollen and strong, or keep heading down a rocky stretch of terrain where at least I can negotiate my footing? Thankfully, I still hear his voice saying, “hang on buster, let’s dial it back a notch and think about what you’re about to do.”
Dad passed away from several medical/physical conditions, but it was the Alzheimer’s disease that broke him down mercilessly. I was the last to feed him real food, his favorite of roast pork with rice and beans. I have a few family pictures I scanned right after he died, so I could keep them electronically and look back, way back, at how he got me to where I am in this life. How I wish I could do so many things over and thank him today for all his sacrifice and care. He taught me regret is an anchor, so I’ll press on down the pathways he cut for me.
If you guys are using the Internet in heaven, I just want to say I miss you Dad…
(Dad and me c.1972)
Trying to tell me something?
Jun 13, 2009 sojourn Leave a comment
Seems the harder I try to eliminate distractions of late, the more distracted I get. It’s not trivial stuff either, some of the scenarios are simply life hitting cycles I knew would come, but all at once?
I’m not getting into details ’cause that’s not the point.
What’s key right now is that I keep my ear to the ground for the voice of God and my nose to the grindstone, doing what I can to progress as a player, writer and performer. We watched a Ralph Murphy/ASCAP webcast at NSAI last Tuesday. Funny though I’ve heard what Ralph spoke of many times, there were a couple of threads that resonated anew.
Like the word “blame” shouldn’t be in my vocabulary, at least when it comes to my journey as a writer/musician. It’s up to me to hone my skills and persevere. Rejection and disappointment are part of the process and if I’m not getting rejected regularly I’m not out there working it. And no matter what obstacles I face, I have to do what’s necessary to keep the passion sparked. Keep listening and experimenting and learning and when I get knocked down, get back up again, fight off the anger and fear that creeps in, and dive headfirst right back into the process.
Like I said, the distractions I’m experiencing are pretty significant, routines and responsibilities are changing, but a direction for any type resolution doesn’t seem obvious, at least not right now. A few days ago I woke out of a dream where I was buying a drink in a small town store. The person behind the counter asked if I was just passing through, I replied “for now”. And I’ve a couple other pretty vivid dreams of late where I’m living in a more wide open space with other “newness” around me. Again, not sure what to make of it, but it feels like someone is trying to tell me something.
I’m listening.
Different Game
After a very thought provoking service this [Sunday] morning, I took the afternoon totally off from anything but enjoying the outstanding tennis from Roland Garros in Paris at the 2009 French Open. Having played in years gone by, I get the passion and toil that goes into competing, and how the ebbs and flows of a match play with the mind.
Afterward, I sipped some coffee, made notes and doodled ideas for a lyric I’ve been working on seemingly forever, wondering — am taking the wrong angle, trying to be too fine, pressing… just like I used to when I was on the wrong end of the score in the 3rd set of a tough match?
Yep, the comparison is there. Tennis is grueling, yet there’s art to it, too, and I won’t give up on this lyric/song much the same as I would never give up the fight in any match I’d play. Not that I played “serious” competitive tennis, more like a few club tourneys and years of public court knock down drag out matches. So here I am a songwriter and musician, not competing at the label level, but working at it nonetheless, same passion, different game.
Why?
Why not? I love what I do and am able to get done, and while I’m by no means prolific or published or p-whatever, I keep writing, and playing and competing… till I play my last point.
I also enjoy watching my friends, peers and acquaintances compete to get heard, write for the art sing for the joy of it all. This week I got to play, hang or listen to some really good writers and musicians, next week should be just as cool. Over the last 24 hours, though, I’ve been tracking a real interesting thread that might be of interest to you, too:
A relatively new virtual acquaintance is a singer/songwriter in TN with a contagious passion she pours into life and her songs. She’s on a mission to get to Chicago and using her smarts to help this cause by posting a set of tracks for the taking, though she’s hoping folks who can will “chip in” and help fund her road trip. The project is called “Ten in Ten“, check it out.
Like I said, I don’t know Courtney, we may never meet, speak or whatever, that doesn’t matter. She’s got game and she’s bringing it. I don’t know if she plays tennis, but she’s the kind of match I used to get cranked up for, and the kinda writer I’ll do what’s possible to support.
Erasure
May 24, 2009 sojourn 1 Comment
Seems like eons since the peaceful refuge of holiday just over a week ago. Happily, I came home determined to avoid getting back into dead-end ruts that often squeeze the life out my creativity. Catching up at work after time away is always quirky and challenging, but things went pretty well, and I was also able to reset myself at home, too.
What was different?
Before heading out for vacation I built a new personal dashboard into a mind map to help me be ready to get things done (GTD) upon return, and by Friday night I was ready for a productive weekend. Cool thing is when stuff I consider important gets done, time for unplanned, yet valuable efforts sprouts from these seeds of planning.
This weekend a few new CDs crossed my path, so I’ve been listening to a lot of different styles, including Bon Iver, Jason Mraz and The Country Way (Vol. 2), the latter delivered with this month’s American Songwriter. I also had time for Austin City Limits, and catching up on reading articles I’d dog-eared in magazines or online as well as tweak a couple of songs that are now ready for home demo.
The activities of the last 48 or so hours erased last week’s smog and brought about a little clarity — I’m not looking back.
Level Rising
May 17, 2009 muse Leave a comment
I’ve just returned from a totally sweet week on HHI (Hilton Head Isle, SC), always a bit of downer coming home to “reality”, but then, reality is what it’s all about, right? As grateful as I am for the escape, for the rest and restoration I so needed, I’m also looking fwd to what comes of it all.
Long walks on the beach brought peace and stirring. Observing the joy of a child’s first encounter with the ocean and watching my youngest daughter catch a wave on a 50 ft. boogie board ride left imprints on my mind. Swimming out to get as close as possible to the 4 -5 dolphin some 100 yards off shore was scary and exhilarating. Perhaps not as scary as sneaking up on a 500+ pound gator for a picture, thankfully it slipped back into the lagoon before I could get any closer. Having enough sense to make up for picking the wrong restaurant early in the week worked out, and all was forgiven.
We beat the weather odds Friday and had the perfect final afternoon on the beach (yes, beach time was the absolute highlight of my week). Not a typical sun clad afternoon, but us in the midst of storm clouds wrapped around the island, enjoying the waves and breeze and never getting rained on for a solid 3 hours.
When we got back to the “hut” I got to thinking that in the midst of the “normal” stuff one does on vacation, I also was very fortunate to stay connected to songwriting and art in general. I skimmed more of a book called “How to Think Like Leonardo da Vinci”, blogged and journaled, applied to Horse & Writer, re-learned a couple of my old songs, got a first look at some prospective layouts for my web presence, discovered Robinella while browsing through a gift store, and spent a good bit of time enjoying the evening breeze while sipping a beverage and contemplating… what’s next?
I’ve got more on my plate than I can handle for the next 6 weeks, but I’m going for it. There are also 3-4 half written songs I’ll add to the mix knowing, too, that my life at work could be about to change rather drastically. Sometimes it takes a little faith to “unclog the pen” and get the flow of prose and lyrics and melody flowing again, sometimes it takes alot. Last week was a major blessing to me, and I believe to my family as well. My well was running low, it feels good to have the creativity level rising again.
Labor Bears Fruit
May 13, 2009 sojourn Leave a comment
Today’s been really cool. Got news that friends (congrats Alan, Jimm, Jessica, Dusti) did well in the John Lennon songwriting contest, and a co-writer of mine (way to go Allen) won a Telly Award! This is one of the reasons I love writing, it’s being part of a community, albeit more virtual every day, whose members work hard to put their art out there and be heard.
I’m grateful that even while vacationing on Hilton Head Island this week I still can write and stay plugged in to what’s going on. Though I missed our NSAI meeting last night, I’ll get the “scoop” from my good friends The Cloers. John and Cate are not only wonderful writers and musicians, they have an unparalleled passion to share what they know with other indie artists, and they do it so well.
So, I’ve made my mind up to apply to the Horse & Writer Invitational, which, if selected, would quite likely be my most unique songwriting adventure to date. While I don’t expect to make it, it’s a step in the right direction, as the application process is more involved than any other I’ve completed and really helped me level set my current state as a writer.
But today is about the success of friends, and I plan to celebrate it, even from afar!